by pdswebteam | May 30, 2018 | Uncategorized
Dear Friends,
- Do you find it hard to stay consistently positive and happy?
- Do some events or people upset, irritate or hurt you?
- Do you ever wonder why life is not going the way you want it to?
How many minds do we have?
Well some of you may know that we really are creating our reality.. whether we like it or not! Actually we are by default on “automatic pilot” mode and we are NOT in the drivers seat of our lives.
They say we have two minds, a conscious one and an unconscious one. The one we use most to make decisions, set goals and decide our future is the conscious one. eg. I will get fit, stop eating junk, meditate every morning or quit my job. The unconscious mind is a minefield of empowering resources as well as limitations and negative emotions such as fear and doubt etc
Now should the two minds we have engage in battle – have you ever experienced that inner conflict, a dilemma or simple indecisiveness? Well should they conflict.. guess which mind will win hands down? Thats right.. its the unconscious mind.. it wins 9 times out of 10!
So the question I kept asking myself is “Why didn’t they teach us this at school?” and “how come they never taught us how to handle our two minds, our strong emotions, our thought patterns? I still ask and I am still wondering…
Whats an empowering mindset?
Wondering is actually a key principle – when we get very curious about ourselves, our behaviours, about why we do what we do and HOW we can get into that driver’s seat of ours and take control so that WE can win the battle, we can walk our talk and we can get what we want in our career, finance, relationship, health and personal life!
Why am I writing this to you?
The tools and tips I will be offering you are not intended to give you a full overhaul or a detox of the past.. nor are they intended to fully resolve your biggest issues.. I usually offer full breakthrough coaching programs in person for that kind of work as some of you know!
However these exercises that i suggest may indeed give you a drip drip effect.. they may just inspire you to think differently about a situation, they might give you an insight, or remind you that the problem isn’t as big as you have made it.
I call this update Small but Mighty” because sometimes these small exercises or actions or break in a thought pattern can actually have a huge effect. You see we often use 80% effort and it brings 20% results, yet a smaller 20% of new, insightful, different activity and effort could actually bring 80% of the results! Confused?.. thats perfect.. confusion and curiosity are the first steps to accessing your biggest “lean mean learning machine” ie your unconcious mind – the awareness of which and communication with allows us to access all our unlimited sources of help, our inner manual to life and our inner wisdom.
Are you ready to get into the driver’s seat of your life?
If you are unsure of where to start with your journey of self-discovery and empowerment here’s a clue:
First Child: “How do you eat an elephant?”
Second Child: “One bite at a time!”
First Child: “But where do i start?”
Second Child: “You can start anywhere.. just START!”
Where can I start?
In coaching the first thing we often do is set a SMART goal ….Smart goals and GROW model I am attaching a worksheet – just click on the orange/underlined phrases to access resources..so this exercise is one you can easily go through by yourself or with a buddy. It could be in response to an area of your life where you would like to improve things – pick something easy and within your control. Let me know how that goes..If you feel overwhelmed, here is a cute video that shows you how to break things down to manageable more chunks
If you are already a frequent goal setter and once you are familiar with the SMART goal setting method you can also program this into your unconscious mind.. if you send me a whatsapp message +254 722 756606 I will send you an audio with a guided recording of my voice. That way you can plant your goal into your future…
I have had several clients and students asking me questions recently about success, prosperity, inner conflict and failure. I highly recommend you watch these inspiring free online video links.. perhaps they will inspire you to set some goals and start taking action. See you at the next update! IF you have specific questions that you would like me to answer please do email me at [email protected]
List of inspiring videos/audios online about Success and Prosperity:
Will Smith talking about success – listen to how he handles his unconscious mind and what empowering beliefs he holds about himself
Audio by Louise Hay on Prosperity – many women tell me they are looking for more financial prosperity
Journalling Tasks:
Do you feel like some self-discovery about people that annoy, irritate you or stress you out? I often use the Work by Byron Katie to help clients loosen up their strong judgements.. these are again just limiting you from achieving fulfilling relationships in your life.. so isn’t it worth a try…?
Do other people trigger you? Here’s a free Book by Byron Katie – there are journalling exercises which will help you discover what is unresolved in yourself.. and how to loosen up your judgements that cause you stress.. try it out!
Tools for letting go of negative emotions or doubts
Do you have a lot of negative emotions or doubts? Try tapping them out with Nick Ortner
My personal experience
Now for the juicy and controversial part about goal setting… and my personal story… I used to think life “happened to me”, I was in a difficult relationship and marriage for nearly 10 years. I thought my husband would change but realised he wouldn’t and it took me a long time to find the strength to leave him. What helped me actually was Neuro Linguistic Programming and Life Coaching – that allowed me to re-build my life and move on from post divorce separation.
I was very actively setting goals especially as I was learning the art and became a life coach myself … so once i got very fluent with setting and achieving goals my life was all ship shape and in order and i became successful at creating my future.
There was a lot of other work apart from goal setting and thats where the other 101 tools of life coaching, NLP and Time Line Therapy (R) Techniques were super handy.
However, despite the success i experienced I actually got BORED.. yes can you imagine.. bored. Because yes, reality would arrive exactly how i had shaped it.. but there was no magic, no surprise and no delight…
No doubt the journey has been truly wonderful as I unravel and integrate the obstacles that any dynamic person or seeker tends to find… i have learnt so much about myself that it has become more exciting than international travel.. seriiously!!
But i still was left wondering.. isn’t there more to life than just designing it? and how come i still feel a little “flat”? I researched further, I managed to have a really magical and enlightening bucket list trip to Japan and I also attended some magical workshops and as I continuted this journey I had some HUGE insights… and I will share these in my update NEXT MONTH!!!
I will also share more tools and answer any questions that you have…
With love and all my best wishes for your personal evolution,
Shilpa
PS: if this update is not interesting to you please do feel free to unsubscribe – there should be a link at the bottom of the email. I won’t take offence at all, promise! The inner work of self-discovery and empowerment is not for everyone and my style also may not apply to your needs. Thank you in advance.
by pdswebteam | Aug 21, 2016 | Blogs by Shilpa, Uncategorized
https://www.facebook.com/InsideOutConsultancy/posts/1170638459666825:0
by pdswebteam | Dec 24, 2015 | Uncategorized
Am doing the Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron – highly recommend this – it will stretch out out of your comfort zone and towards the best most adventurous, peaceful and happy YOU!
by pdswebteam | Jul 10, 2015 | Uncategorized
thank you to those who have told me that my article inspired them and touched them…it encourages me to share even more..
by pdswebteam | Jun 15, 2015 | Balanced Life
We all hate long meetings! Who doesn’t? Long conversations that seem to go round in circles with no end. Some think in order to get things done, they need to be long. I have a different opinion on this very important matter.
As a meeting facilitator, I believe I have a solution for you professionals, leaders, and managers. You see, although the details of the meetings are very important and necessary to communicate, the process in how the meeting flows from start to finish is just as imperative. It is the Chair or the facilitator to ensure the process flows as it should.
- Creepy Poison Technique: People speaking at a time can draw out a meeting. I teach my clients different ways of talking. Instead, you can give a person a minute to talk, and stick to it. Everyone can write their views or questions and discuss as a group before sharing with the whole group. This saves time and narrows the discussion process.
- The Six Thinking Hats Technique: Created by Edward de Bono, it is recommended that the Chair create a space for full participation and have the team to think in six clear functions and roles. This encourages the team to clarify the intentions of the meeting.
- Open Space Technology: This method allows for the meeting to be completely owned by the participants. The facilitator is present but invisible. The participants self-organize themselves dealing with the complexity of the issues discussed, diverse solutions, handling any conflict and doing it quickly.
- NLP’s Disney Strategy: This is a process that helps generate solutions to problems. Avoiding our tendency to shoot down ideas that block creativity. Using a structure that has three phases in the generation of ideas. The Dreamer, is what we want to create; The Realist, is how they plan and organize and the Critic reviews the risks.
- The Check list: Similar to what many of use already do, this check list emphasizes an efficient flow of dialogue. Were the meeting and the people appropriately introduced?
- Was the agenda used, and adhered to?
- Was time well managed? (Did the meeting start and finish on time; was the right amount of time spent on each item?)
- Were the people well managed – brought into the discussion (or shut up!) as appropriate?
- Was someone taking minutes or (better) writing notes onto a flipchart?
- Were any necessary formalities observed?
- Was the purpose of the meeting clear to all and did we draw real conclusions and make decisions?
- Feedback: A method that only has you improving future meetings based on what is said but show the power of vulnerability to those in the meeting. Knowing your weakness is humbling and urges growth.
by pdswebteam | Jun 1, 2015 | Balanced Life
Like many women, I struggled with my weight soon after I had had my daughter and turned forty. In addition to being a snacker and foodie, the weight just crept on. I knew I was losing control and wanted to get it back. I know that I am not alone in this battle.
Man or woman, we want to get back in shape in some way or other. It takes many of us many tries. Not one shoe fits all. For some, like me, it took a number of strategies to get me where I needed to be.
I started off with Pilates. a specialized form of exercise that is designed to improve physical strength, flexibility, and posture, and enhance mental awareness. I even had a personal trainer on this part of my journey. I built strength and endurance. It was amazing. However, I was still a size 14. I wanted to be smaller.
My next line of action was to enroll a nutritionist. They often say that you are what you eat. I was listening. But, if you know anything about nutritionists, you know they drive a hard bargain. The strict plan was more than I could handle. Difficult to stick to the regimen of not eating all those food I love, I had to think plan “c”.
Where I should have started is where I ended, at dealing with my habits, working on my emotional state and thus find a way to change my mindset about food and my body.
There is a technique called: “family constellations”. It is essentially an alternative therapeutic method which draws on elements of family systems therapy, existential phenomenology towards family and self. I used this method to deal with the foods I loved but were keeping me from my weight goals. I dealt with the “have it all” attitude which had me indulging in desserts, cappuccinos and pastries. Through the process, I programmed my mindset to choose nature and sunshine rather than the contents of a cookie jar.
There is another technique, “Submodalities” that helped me kick the chocolate-biscuits-eating after dinner. The technique quickly has you have your mind moves something you deem as “yummy” to “yuck”. This powerful method, effectively has you switching your likes to dislikes in minutes. To this day, has me cringing at and wanting to wretch!
One last stop was going to a coach. You see, we have limited beliefs, an illogical way our unconscious minds work. A limiting belief I seemed to carry was that: “If I get slim and attractive, I risk getting pregnant again.” A belief set by a traumatizing pregnancy and delivery. With my coach’s help and through a number of methods including, Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP), Strategic Intervention (Tony Robbins) and EquilibritEion (Janetta Barry).
Losing weight is often an uphill battle. This process had me look outside the box. Even as far as getting a coach for myself, even though I am a trainer of coaches. The journey of expanding and growing ensures that I be a better person. With every hurdle I get over, I share and apply my experiences with others like you.
If you have a hurdle you need help with, do not hesitate to get in touch! It is never a bad idea to liberate yourself of any habit or limiting belief that keeps you back from your goals!
by pdswebteam | May 18, 2015 | Balanced Life
Emotional fitness is a state of mind where you are able to maintain a stream of positive thoughts and thus be able to focus on creative and constructive tasks. It is recommended that one maintain their emotional fitness as it is the key to all aspects of our lives.
So how do you do harness emotional fitness?
There are a few tools I use. The first is Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) which was brought to the world by Gary Craig. The second is Timeline Therapy, an amazing technique created by Tad James. Lastly, I often meditate. My favourite two methods are the Wholeness Meditation by Schinta Abhavaratn and the Chakra Mediation by Deepak Chopra.
Here is how you can use the Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) to maintain your emotional fitness. EFT is all about tapping or massaging acupressure points on your head, face, and upper body. Tapping these pressure points, while deep breathing and repeating affirming statements welcomes a desired emotion or belief that you are resisting.
Did you know that an emotion is simply energy in motion? And imagine that this motion simply flows through us if we were not afraid or resistant to it. EFT works on your invisible body, what the Chinese call meridians. EFT works quickly to calm someone down or to change their mood within a few minutes.
EFT provided emotional support where I did not think there was any. When I was pregnant, our housekeeper passed away tragically in a road accident. I was incredibly shocked and traumatized. My friend suggested I do EFT. And through tapping, my intense emotional distress and shock reduced from a rating of 9/10 (extreme crying and panic, etc.) right down to 3/10 (where I could actually think straight about how I could assist his family with their immediate needs).
For a few weeks, I repeated the technique at least twice a day. The process provided me the emotional fitness to weather the storm. By being emotionally fit, I am aware, tuned in to my needs and others and able to flow with life’s ups and downs positively.
Everyone is different, so everyone will gravitate to different methods on finding one’s emotional fitness. The point is, we all need to find balance. Life has its shocks and awe, with your processes in hand, you can handle whatever comes forth!
I facilitate workshops in Emotional Fitness and Stress Management and also coach people individually on balancing their emotions. Let me know how I can get you and yours emotionally balanced.
by pdswebteam | Apr 8, 2014 | Uncategorized
Shilpa just delivered a 2 day workshop for MLC Kindergarten Teachers and Head Teacher… It was really inspiring!
The tailor made workshop had the following objectives:
– know more about how communication works (using NLP models)
– have learnt and practised some techniques for smoother delegation of work and resolving conflicts
– have gained skills in giving feedback to others (colleagues as well as students)
– have experienced some tools for facilitating participatory meetings and brainstorming
– have revisited and understood better MLCs values
– have applied some coaching and goal setting techniques to support your team mates
– have set yourself a SMART goal and gained some insights about achieving it
So what’s the difference between Criticism and Feedback?
Teamwork..
Some drama to internalise the new technique “Interaction Feedback”
– showing how it’s not to be done as well as how to do it well!!
It was Shilpa’s birthday – I spent it doing what I love to do – train and inspire others! What a lovely surprise they gave me with a cake and lots of singing and flowers and a huge card!! WOW!
And Zahra’s new definition of NLP – love it!
Unleashing creativity and refreshing our Mission, Vision and Core Values through art and groupwork
So which group made the best poster and presentation?
Cake for Shilpa – yummy!! Thank you MLC teachers – I had the best birthday with you all!!
by pdswebteam | Dec 17, 2013 | Uncategorized
Gifts of 2013 and Goals for 2014 workshop delivered by Inside Out for CISP Somalia
“Gifts of 2013 and Goals for 2014” was the
theme of CISP regional office’s end-of-year retreat held at Gracia Gardens. This was chance for us to rejuvenate, to bond, to reflect and to learn.
At the lush Gracia Gardens, we meet Shilpa and Marianne two life coaches who turn out to be very interesting facilitators. They had prepared a rigorous and captivating program for the day. They helped us reflect on the year that is and the year to come; by focusing on our strengths, weaknesses, successes as well as our failures. This was to make us rediscover ourselves as well as our passion for our work. Marco reckons, “this approach was different and very explorative.”
Through a range of indoor and outdoor activities, from simple bonding exercises, to problem solving exercises and intensive discussions; we derived lessons about team work, communication and self-improvement. The group knot game was particularly interesting; we mingled and divided ourselves in two groups of 13 people. We randomly held hands forming a tangled knot, the challenge was to untangle without letting go of either of the hands you are holding. This was a very engaging and interactive game; Francesco deemed it “a great bonding moment.” The game made us think as a team and learn how to communicate well to achieve group goals. “It’s nice to take a break and get refreshed through team bonding,” expressed Brianna.
Marianne stretched our minds when she shared the five principles on communicating well. This generated heated discussions as people’s perceptions were put to the test. The principles encouraged us to be more accommodating to our differences. According to Marianne “communication is not what you say but how you say it.”
The day ended on a high, an endorphin high, as we practiced Laughter yoga. It is usually practiced in groups, with participants maintaining eye contact and being playful and does not involve humor or comedy. The laughter soon turned into real and contagious laughter giving us a “feel good” feeling. It was exciting, “it’s like taking a fish into a pond” remarked Susan. In our extremely good mood we were ready to put our 2014 vision on paper. We creatively expressed our desires for our team and organization by making colorful posters. Triza thought that this was different in a good way. We left Gracia Gardens renewed, and full of positivity.
by pdswebteam | Dec 17, 2013 | Uncategorized
cess.
y.
daughter and turned forty. In addition to being a snacker and foodie, the weight just crept on. I knew I was losing control and wanted to get it back. I know that I am not alone in this battle.
is how you can use the Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT) to maintain your emotional fitness. EFT is all about tapping or massaging acupressure points on your head, face, and upper body. Tapping these pressure points, while deep breathing and repeating affirming statements welcomes a desired emotion or belief that you are resisting.
